In the epic saga of condo mismanagement, a Board That Must Not Be Named – a mysterious body whose meetings produce more bylaws than sense – valiantly set out to protect the kingdom from the horrors of… *two dogs*. Armed with email complaints, hallway surveillance, and a heroic lack of proportionality, they pursued the dangerous duo – Rex and Friend – with the zeal usually reserved for international espionage.
🏢 **Chapter 1: The Dogpocalypse Begins**
President hears barking. He writes logs. Many, many logs – or at least this is what he claims. They describe terrifying events like… a plunger? And a chew toy. Shocking stuff.
🔍 **Chapter 2: Surveillance City**
Board members and staff engage in a covert photo-op of owner. Move aside James Bond – we’ve got barking to catch on film.
⚖️ **Chapter 3: Tribunal Dropkicks Overreach**
The Tribunal ruled: 1) No nuisance. 2) Accommodation justified. 3) generous damages. 4) Stop pretending dogs are widgets.
👩⚕️ **Medical Facts vs. Condo Fiction**
The Board That Must Not Be Named thought they could override specialists with… condo rules. And somehow believed ‘share a dog’ was a valid disability accommodation.
💸 **Moral of the Story? **
Spending hundreds of thousands in community funds to fight a dog. Because clearly, that’s the hill to die on.
🎭 BONUS SCENE: ‘Bark Your Defence!’
In a gripping twist, the dog is called before the Condo Inquisition Panel. Charges: Excessive wagging, illegal emotional support, and… possessing a chew toy in common areas.
Above: Rex the Dog faces serious allegations from the Board. Board member (far right) reportedly muttered, ‘It’s always the quiet ones.’
Disclaimer: This post is satire and opinion. Read full disclaimer.
