Ah, democracy. That beautiful system where the people elect their representatives… and then never see them again.
In this week’s episode of Mildred’s Marching Orders, we bring you the tale of not one, but two freshly acclaimed board members -let’s call them Donna the Distant and Beverly the Brief. These weren’t your average residents stepping up to serve the community. No, these were handpicked pals of Mildred, drafted like reluctant bridesmaids in a wedding no one wanted to attend.
Their mission? Not to govern. Not to ask questions. Certainly not to represent anyone’s interests.
They were asked to run solely to block anyone not friendly toward Mildred from getting on the ballot.
You know, a little preemptive gatekeeping to keep the club exclusive.
And once the election charade was complete?
Poof. Like seasonal mall Santas, they vanished before the first board meeting ever took place.
That’s right – they resigned before even warming their chairs. No motions. No minutes. No measurable contribution.
And now they’re gone, perhaps to audition for the next community theatre production of “Yes, Mildred”.
It’s not governance.
It’s not transparency.
It’s a game of musical chairs, except the music is Mildred humming to herself while she rubber-stamps decisions.
We deserve better.
We deserve a board that shows up – literally and figuratively.
Disclaimer: This post is satire and opinion. Read full disclaimer.
