Condo Chronicles

When the Board wants to clear itself of wrongdoing, what do they do?
Simple. They hire a lawyer.
Not just any lawyer – an “independent” investigator with a magnifying glass in one hand and blinders in the other.

Let’s call her Madam Inquisitor.

Her mandate?
Investigate the complainant – without ever actually speaking to them.
That’s right: Sherlock skipped the part where she interviews the victim.
A bold strategy. Bold and lazy.

But wait, it gets better.
When a former board member came forward to confirm what really happened – like Mildred’s trash-talking of the complainant during board meetings – our impartial Colombo threw that evidence out. Why? Because it made Queen Mildred look bad. And you never question the Queen.

Exhibit A?
A video recording – not faked, not vague – a conversation between two residents who knew all about the complainant’s medical information and some….

The response?
“Oh, it might have been disclosed during routine Board communications.”
Translation: oopsie daisy, guess your private medical information is watercooler material now.

To recap:

☑️ Skip the complainant entirely – Why let facts get in the way of a perfectly good whitewash?

☑️ Disregard the eyewitness – Especially if they had the audacity to witness something inconvenient.

☑️ ️ Explain away a flagrant privacy violation as “business as usual” – because nothing says professionalism like airing medical details – someone else’s – over tea and biscuits.

Mission accomplished, objectivity assassinated.

But please, tell me again how this was an “independent” investigation?
The only thing independent here was the investigator’s independence from facts, fairness, and professional ethics.

If this is due process, Mildred is the Pope.

Disclaimer: This post is satire and opinion. Read full disclaimer.