Move over, Marie Antoinette – there’s a new queen in town, and she’s ruling over Blenvale with powdered hair, a $650/hour lawyer, and a royal decree that goes something like this:
“No borrowing by-law! Fees stay high!”
Yes, dear owners, meet Queen Mildred, our very own condo-era Antoinette. When faced with the rising costs of building repairs and the desperate cries of owners being crushed by record-high condo fees, her solution wasn’t prudence, transparency, or – heaven forbid – financial planning. No, Queen Mildred clutched her pearls (and her legal budget) and waved away the idea of a borrowing by-law with the elegance of someone who’s never had to read a reserve fund study.
You see, in 18th-century France, Marie Antoinette never actually said “Let them eat cake,” but the phrase stuck because it captured the absurd detachment of the aristocracy. In 21st-century Blenvale, Queen Mildred didn’t just say “Let them pay high fees” – she enacted it.
When reminded that the board had already spent money drafting a borrowing by-law – yes, that happened in 2023 – Queen Mildred and her legal babysitters from SueMore & BillMore conveniently forgot. Just like a royal court pretending the treasury isn’t empty while ordering another round of gold-plated legal advice.
And let’s be clear: we’re not talking about volunteers scrambling to do their best. We’re talking about a board that spends hundreds of thousands on lawyers, hides key facts, misleads owners, and then insists the only way forward is to squeeze the community harder. That’s not service. That’s spin.
So here we are: the peasants are restless, the treasury is bleeding, and the Queen is on her throne, clutching a receipt for $650/hour like it’s a royal scepter.
Let them pay fees, indeed.
Disclaimer: This post is satire and opinion. Read full disclaimer.
