How a Former Board Member Found Shelter Under the Corporation Umbrella – After Setting the House on Fire
In the ongoing series “You Literally Can’t Make This Up,” today’s episode features a fascinating tale of irony, entitlement, and selective privilege.
Once upon a recent time, a former board member – let’s call him Sir Signature Collector of Smearshire – decided to take it upon himself to defame me. Not while wearing his little boardroom crown. Oh no. He had long abdicated the throne. He was acting as a plain old owner, clipboard in hand, going door-to-door with gossip and gall.
He wasn’t acting in his role as a director. He was acting in his role as… well, himself. A private citizen on a personal mission of character assassination.
And yet – brace yourselves – the Corporation’s insurance policy is now being used to fund his legal defence in the resulting defamation case.
Let’s pause and review:
- âś… He was not a director at the time.
- âś… He acted without board authority.
- âś… He made personal defamatory statements.
- âś… He targeted another owner, not on behalf of the Corporation, but out of his own apparent boredom or malice.
- ✅ He was playing “Neighbourhood Hero”—armed with paper, pen, and baseless allegations.
And now?
He’s tucked safely behind the Corporation’s insurance lawyers; his legal bills paid for by – drumroll – all of us. Including the person he defamed.
Because apparently, defamation is now a common expense.
Imagine the precedent:
If you’re a former board member and you feel like slandering your neighbour, don’t worry. Just do it loudly enough, and the Corporation might cover your legal bills too. It’s “Post-Service Perks” – Harassment Edition.
Meanwhile, when actual owners ask legitimate questions or request transparency?
We’re told the Corporation “Can’t get involved in private disputes.”
Unless, it seems, the private dispute is being waged by one of their own.
So here we are.
A former director.
A personal vendetta.
And a legal tab footed by the very community he tried to poison.
No apology. No explanation. Just the magic of selective privilege.
Is it abuse of insurance?
Is it misuse of community funds?
Is it oppression by proxy?
Yes, yes, and yes.
But don’t worry. I’m sure the board will assure you this is “entirely appropriate.” And of course, they “consulted legal counsel.” Specifically, Suemore & Billmore LLP – the very same legal seers who assured them they’d definitely win the appeal. Spoiler: they lost. Spectacularly.
It’s almost poetic.
Disclaimer: This post is satire and opinion. Read full disclaimer.
