CondoLand, July 2025
In the latest episode of Blazer and the Board: Reality Is Optional, our fearless leader, Blazer, has bravely chosen to not inform the owners that the Corporation LOST its appeal in Divisional Court.
That’s right. Lost. As in, three Superior Court judges collectively raised an eyebrow, glanced at each other, and said, “Nope.”
But did Blazer – Lord High Chancellor of Lies and Supreme Minister of Board Spin – announce this to the community?
Of course not.
Instead, he performed a full bureaucratic magic trick:
🎩 Step 1: Lose in court.
🪄 Step 2: Say nothing.
🎠Step 3: Reappear next meeting with a PowerPoint titled “Why We’re Still Technically Right, Spiritually Speaking.”
📉 Transparency? Never Heard of Her.
Some boards believe in owner communication. Ours believes in… interpretive silence.
You see, when Blazer thinks they’re going to win, the updates flow like wine:
“We are defending the community! We are right! Legal costs are an investment in justice!”
But when they lose?
Crickets.
🦗
Possibly a puff of smoke and a strategically placed newsletter about landscaping.
🕵️‍♂️ Where’s the Announcement?
We checked all the usual spots:
- The bulletin board? Nope.
- The community email? Silent.
- The hallway scroll delivered by raven? Missing.
- Carrier pigeon? Dead of shame.
Not a peep. Not even a passive-aggressive post-it from Mildred.
🧠The Official Explanation (Probably):
When asked why the board failed to notify the owners, Blazer was overheard muttering:
“We were waiting for the appeal of the appeal of the appeal. Also Mercury was in retrograde. Also… we just didn’t feel like it.”
Meanwhile, legal costs mount, trust evaporates, and Blazer continues to roam the halls like a red-shorted oracle of alternative facts.
🗞️ The Real Headline They Forgot to Send:
BREAKING: Blenvale Loses Appeal. Again. Still Thinks It’s Winning.
Residents remain uninformed. Blazer remains unbothered.
But don’t worry. Here at CondoTribune.com, we’ve got your back – and your front-page news – because somebody has to sweep up after the Ministry of Misinformation.
Disclaimer: This post is satire and opinion. Read full disclaimer.
