In the ever-evolving field of disability accommodation, Blenvale has broken new ground.
Move over, Mayo Clinic.
Step aside, CAMH.
The real innovation in psychiatric care now comes from Blazer & Co., who have boldly suggested that two adults with disabilities could simplyâŠ
đ¶ âShare the dog.â
Yes, you read that correctly.
Why stop at inclusive policy when you can propose joint custody of a service animal like itâs a bicycle?
A Few Follow-Up Ideas While Weâre At It:
- Split a cane: One gets it Monday to Wednesday, the other gets it Thursday to Sunday. Saturdays are optional unless youâre limping.
- Rotate hearing aids: Alternate weeks. Just shout across the courtyard on off-days.
- Emotional Support Shiftsâą: Your panic attack must be scheduled between 2â4pm or youâll be billed for overtime.
Why stop there?
Perhaps we could build a community kennel – you know, a one-size-fits-all emotional support lounge. Just check in, pick a dog, cry into its fur, and return it within the hour.
Bring your own Kleenex.
What This Actually Reveals
Letâs be honest – this isnât about âcreative compromise.â
This is what happens when a board would rather invent nonsense than accept the simple legal reality:
You must accommodate people with disabilities. Fully. Not fractionally.
Service animals arenât community property.
Theyâre medical supports, prescribed by healthcare professionals – not something you barter over like bonus locker space.
So to those still clutching the âshare the dogâ idea with both hands and no shame, may I gently suggest:
Youâre not drafting policy.
Youâre writing satire.
You just didnât mean to.
Disclaimer: This post is satire and opinion. Read full disclaimer.
