🗳️ Blazer and the Case of the Criminal Flyer:

Democracy, Apparently, Is a One-Way Street

Picture it: The requisitioned owners’ meeting. A room half-filled with folding chairs, half-filled with egos, and fully filled with tension. Enter Blazer – puffed-up with righteous indignation and a stack of crumpled flyers in hand, as though he were holding the last will and testament of the Empire itself.

With a dramatic flourish, Blazer waves the flyers like they’re contraband smuggled out of Cold War Berlin.

“I saw him!” he gasps, pointing at my partner as though accusing him of a war crime. “I saw him putting these… these… flyers on doors!”

And the crowd gasps – not at the shocking “crime” of information-sharing during elections, but at the sheer absurdity of it all.

🧾 Let’s Talk Facts

Let’s take a quick walk through the actual rules – not the ones Blazer scribbles in his daydreams, but the ones in black and white, passed by the Corporation:

📜 Flyers during elections are permitted.
Yes, really. This is a democracy (well, technically), and the Condominium Act and our own governing documents recognize that candidates are entitled to campaign, including through printed materials.

🔒 Removing flyers from unit doors is not just petty – it’s a felony.
Let’s be very clear: If you remove someone else’s property from their front door – that’s theft under $5,000, a criminal offence under the Criminal Code, s. 322. Doesn’t matter if you don’t like the content. Doesn’t matter if it bruises your ego. If you took it, you stole it.

And yes, Blazer, that includes the flyers calling for transparency and fair governance. The ones that dared to suggest that maybe – just maybe – the board should follow the law.

📣 The Hypocrisy Bonus Round

Because irony is Blazer’s favourite seasoning, let’s not forget:
While he was clutching flyers like stolen treasure and playing neighbourhood watch, he was simultaneously using the community portal to run a smear campaign against the opposition.

That’s right – the Corporation’s official portal, funded by your condo fees, was apparently open for Blazer’s personal attack campaign, complete with mischaracterizations, selective “facts,” and passive-aggressive prose fit for a teenage diary.

It’s good to know that when it comes to condo resources, speech is only “free” when Blazer writes it.

🧠 A Lesson in Civic Engagement

What’s especially rich is the context. This all happened during a condo election, when owners were trying to inform their neighbours and rally support to improve governance. That’s not “disruption” – that’s the democratic process. That’s what elections are for. You don’t get to call for democracy only when you’re being re-elected by acclamation.

🔁 The Real Offence

So let’s recap:
✅ My partner puts up a flyer – legal, permitted, peaceful
❌ Blazer removes them – illegal, petty, criminal
❌ Blazer uses a community platform – to smear the person obeying the rules

If you’re still wondering how we ended up in a governance Twilight Zone, you’re not alone.

🧾 PS: Blazer, if you still have those flyers, we’d like them back.

You know – the ones you removed from private property without permission?
Those are evidence now.

Disclaimer: This post is satire and opinion. Read full disclaimer.

Condo Chronicles