🐷 The Rules Apply Equally (Except When They Don’t)

A Condo Allegory Inspired by Orwell, Redaction, and Dryer Hose Politics

Somewhere between Animal Farm and your last condo AGM lies the truth:

“All residents are equal, but some residents are more equal than others.”

Welcome to Blenvale – where rules are enforced with the same consistency as the elevator, and fairness depends on how often you play bingo with the Board.

🐶 Chapter 1: Mildred’s Friend’s Dog? Just Being Friendly.

When Mildred’s friend’s off-leash mutt barks at the mail carrier?

“He’s just saying hello! Such a good boy.”

When your certified service dog, leashed and silent, quietly accompanies you through a hallway?

“Disturbance. Unnecessary presence. Rule 7C violation. Possible legal escalation.”

So it’s not about noise.
It’s about who’s holding the leash.

🧺 Chapter 2: Spin Cycle of Selective Enforcement

A former Board president installs a washer/dryer without permission:

“Ah, leadership in action. Pioneering convenience! What initiative!”

You install the same setup:

“Unauthorized appliance. Cease and desist. Lawyered.”

Apparently, when they violate the rules, it’s “practical governance.”
When you do the same?
It’s a breach of the sacred laundry code punishable by affidavit.

Let us guess – their spin cycle was grandfathered in…
and yours is grounds for litigation.

📜 Chapter 3: Rule Enforcement or Personality Test?

Let’s be honest: the rules aren’t the problem.
The problem is how they’re enforced – selectively, punitively, and Orwellian-ly.

“No one is above the rules,” they say.
But apparently, some are beside them, beneath them, or grandfathered through them by osmosis.

🐴 Welcome to Animal Condo Farm

Where:

The Board = The ruling class with a free pass and a plastic laundry hose
You = The scapegoat with a court file and a redacted records request
Enforcement = A game of Pin the Violation on the Disfavored Resident

Sound familiar? It should. You live here.

Sound familiar? It should. You live here.

🧠 Final Thought: Orwell Wasn’t Writing Fiction. He Was Predicting Your AGM.

So the next time you hear:

“We enforce the rules equally,”

Just remember:

The board’s dryer hums like a lullaby.
Your dryer hums like legal risk.
Their friends’ dog is a neighbourly ambassador.
Yours is a “challenge to community peace.”

Because in Blenvale, the law applies to all –
Except the friends of the Board.

Disclaimer: This post is satire and opinion. Read full disclaimer.

Condo Chronicles