🩺 The Board’s Guide to Diagnosing Madness

(Spoiler: It’s just “anyone who catches them out”)

According to certain pillars of the community o and by “pillars,” I mean the wobbly, cracked kind that crumble under a light breeze – I’m unstable.

Why? Because I keep a blog that makes the board look bad.
Not by making things up. Not by slandering.
Just by… pointing out what they’ve actually done in full, unflattering daylight.

And here’s the real kicker – in their world, being intelligent and informed is practically a felony.

📊 Exhibit A: My Analysis

I read the balance sheets. I notice when the operating fund drops from +$46K to –$69K. I chart the $2.18 million reserve plunge. I remember to ask where the $25,511 prepaid to lawyers fits into the “we’re doing great!” fairy tale.

Apparently, this is what an “unstable mind” does now – math.

🎭 Exhibit B: My Satire

I turn their newsletters into humour that lands because it’s based entirely on reality. The jokes sting because the truth is already ridiculous.

This, too, is apparently madness – taking the board’s own words and holding them up like a mirror. (Warning: Objects in mirror may be more self-inflicted than they appear.)

🐓 Exhibit C: The Mildred Incident

In one of the more creative attempts at character assassination, Mildred – bless her – announced that I was a Trump supporter.

As if my choice of U.S. politicians (spoiler: I don’t have one, Mildred, I live in Canada and it would definitely not be Trump) somehow invalidates every spreadsheet, court decision, and photo I’ve presented.

What’s next? Claiming I can’t be trusted because I put ketchup on my fries?

🗣 Exhibit D: The “Liar” Label

The board has publicly claimed I lied about board business. They’ve repeated it like a mantra, hoping if they say it enough times, it’ll stick.

Yet here we are, year after year, with my so-called “lies” turning into verifiable events:

✅ I said the operating fund was headed into the red – it is.
✅ I said the reserve would be drawn down hard – it was.
✅ I said legal spending was baked in – look at “Prepaid Legal Retainer”.

Calling me a liar at this point is like calling a weather forecaster wrong after they nailed the hurricane warning.

🔄 The Real Translation

In their world:

Stable: Smiling politely while the finances burn.
Unstable: Knowing what accruals are and pointing out the ones they forgot to mention.
Stable: Calling debt “cash flow timing.”
Unstable: Reading the Condominium Act and realizing “reasonable” doesn’t mean “whatever the board was already doing.”
Criminal: Possessing intelligence, facts, and the audacity to use them out loud.

🎯 Final Diagnosis

If using evidence, timelines, and a functioning memory makes me “unstable,” then hand me the straitjacket and a calculator.
Because all my “delusions” come with receipts – and, unlike their projects, mine are always on budget.

So now, dear reader, after seeing the analysis, the charts, the documented facts, and the satire rooted in reality – do you honestly think this blog is the product of an unstable person?
A liar?
Or is it the product of someone who simply refuses to swallow the board’s half-truths and omissions without spitting them back out in public?

Judging by the number of visits this blog receives, I’d say the verdict is in – and it’s a resounding success. The audience knows the difference between instability and inconvenient truth.

Disclaimer: This post is satire and opinion. Read full disclaimer.

Condo Chronicles