Condo Chronicles

🏛️ Scene 1: The Royal Decree of Blenvale

Once upon a condo, in the Kingdom of Blenvale, the Board gathered in secret council.
The air was thick with self-importance and the faint smell of burnt popcorn from another failed “information session.”

“Loyal subjects,” declared King Blazer, “we must pass a new by-law – one that protects us from those who dare to disagree!”

“Brilliant,” said Mildred. “Let us forbid anyone who ever questioned us, sued us, or looked at us funny from running for election. Democracy is exhausting.”

“And let’s call it a Code of Ethics!” shrieked Lady Gwendolyn of the Beatles Bangs.
“Nothing says integrity like banning people who proved us wrong!”

And so they drafted their masterpiece:
The By-law of Eternal Hypocrisy and the Code of Controlled Speech.

⚖️ Scene 2: The Ethics According to Blenvale

The sacred commandments of the Blenvale Code read as follows:

1. Thou shalt act in good faith — unless thou art emailing a tribunal.
2. Thou shalt be transparent — except when hiding $400,000 in legal bills.
3. Thou shalt act in the best interest of the corporation — defined, of course, as ourselves.
4. Thou shalt treat all owners equally — unless they own two service dogs or a conscience.
5. Thou shalt protect privacy — except when publicly disclosing someone’s medical accommodation in a three-page newsletter.
6. Thou shalt not defame — unless thou art defaming the owner who defeated thee in court.
7. Thou shalt avoid conflicts of interest — unless thou art the conflict.
8. Thou shalt respect democracy — unless democracy votes thee out.
9. Thou shalt spend responsibly — especially on lawyers who tell thee what thou wantest to hear.
10. Thou shalt follow the law — eventually, maybe, if it’s convenient.

The crowd applauded politely, mostly because they feared being sued.

💸 Scene 3: The Price of Ignorance

“Will this cost much?” asked one timid villager.
“Oh, only everything you own,” replied Queen Mildred. “But look how ethical we’ll look doing it!”

The Royal Treasury (formerly known as the Reserve Fund) wept quietly as another retainer cheque was signed.

“Remember,” Blazer shouted, “if anyone objects, call it transparency fatigue!”

🧭 Scene 4: The Moral of the Condo

And so, the residents of Blenvale learned a painful truth:
Every time you let fools make laws to protect themselves, you pay for it — literally.

Vote for them again, and you won’t need a Code of Ethics.
You’ll need a Code of Survival.

Disclaimer: This post is satire and opinion. Read full disclaimer.