Step right up, ladies and gentlemen – welcome to the Blenvale Casino, where logic is bankrupt, accountability is a myth, and the house always loses.
Tonight’s main event?
The Three Magnificent Wrecking Balls are back for another round:
🎩 Blazer, the master of red ink.
👵 Mildred, who has seen more closed meetings than the Auditor General.
💂♀️ Lady Gwendolyn, proudly marching to the beat of her own delusion.
🪙 Round One: The Boardroom Roulette
Spin the wheel, Blenvale!
Will they spend $300,000 on lawyers again?
Will they “accidentally” borrow from the reserve fund?
Will they pass another illegal by-law five minutes before the AGM?
Spoiler alert: yes, yes, and yes.
Because in Blenvale, every rule is optional — except the ones they invent to silence whoever points that out.
🐍 Round Two: The Ethics Slot Machine
Pull the lever and watch the buzzwords spin:
Integrity. Transparency. Accountability.
All flashing in bright neon – until you realize the machine’s unplugged.
The new “Code of Ethics” is the latest trick:
A shiny way to ban dissent under the pretense of “decorum.”
It’s not governance – it’s governance cosplay.
🏚️ Round Three: The Bankruptcy Bingo
The numbers are in – and they’re redder than Blazer’s shorts.
- Legal fees: off the charts.
- Reserve fund: raided.
- Reputation: shattered.
But fear not! The Three Magnificent march on, faces glowing with radiant shamelessness.
They look at the wreckage, smile, and say:
“We did our best.”
Indeed they did – their best impression of financial demolition artists.
🪞 Final Bet: How Low Can They Go?
You decide, dear owners.
Vote them back in, and you’re betting against yourselves.
Because every dollar you lose at the Blenvale Casino goes straight into the slot machine marked “Legal Fees.”
So… place your bets!
Will the Blenvale Trifecta of Ruin strike again
or will sanity finally make a comeback?
Disclaimer: This post is satire and opinion. Read full disclaimer.
