Every condo building has its quirks.
Some buildings have mysterious plumbing noises.
Some have elevators that stop on every floor for no reason.
Ours appears to have discovered something far more impressive:
telepathic voting.
👵 The Proxy Retirement Caucus
As previously noted, a very dedicated group of residents appears again and again in the proxy lists.
Same names.
Same voters.
Same reliable participation.
With an average age hovering somewhere around 85, these residents have become the quiet backbone of our building’s electoral process.
Remarkable civic engagement.
Truly inspiring.
🔍 A Little More Curiosity
Naturally, when you see the same names repeatedly deciding elections, you get curious.
So I asked some of them whether they had signed proxies.
The responses were… enlightening.
Many said something along the lines of:
“Oh yes, I signed something… the woman from the office asked me… but I’m not sure what it was.”
Which, if nothing else, adds a certain mystery element to the voting process.
🧠But Here’s the Truly Fascinating Part
When we reviewed the proxies more closely, another astonishing phenomenon appeared.
Not only were the votes cast for the same board members…
But the order of the candidates listed on the proxy was also identical.
Every time.
Exactly the same.
Same candidates.
Same ranking.
Same sequence.
Across multiple proxies.
🧙 The Telepathic Ballot Theory
Now this is where things become genuinely fascinating.
Because it suggests one of two possibilities.
Option A:
A group of residents independently reviewed the candidates, carefully evaluated their qualifications, and then – entirely by coincidence – listed them in the exact same order.
Or…
Option B:
Our building has become the first condominium community to successfully implement telepathic coordination among its voters.
No meetings required.
No discussion needed.
Just a shared psychic understanding of the correct voting order.
🔄 The Efficiency Is Impressive
From a logistical perspective, it’s brilliant.
No messy debate.
No competing visions.
Just perfectly aligned proxies appearing at the exact moment they are needed.
Democracy, but streamlined.
đź“Ś A Small Observation
Proxies are a normal part of condominium governance.
But they’re generally expected to reflect individual decisions by individual owners.
When the same names appear again and again…
And the same votes appear again and again…
And even the exact order of candidates appears again and again…
It does make you pause and wonder.
Not about the voters.
But about how these miracles of alignment keep happening.
And so the legend of the Eternal Proxies continues.
Quietly.
Efficiently.
And apparently… telepathically.
Disclaimer: This post is satire and opinion. Read full disclaimer.
